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Meggan Cheesebagel
18 April 2012 @ 09:08 pm
WTF I fucking hate the new Gmail. It is ugly and impractical and the exact opposite of user-friendly. Oooooohmigod. What. The. Fuck. I really, really, really hate it when people change good things. :( :( :(
Meggan Cheesebagel
12 April 2012 @ 09:51 pm
I have never seriously dated anybody whose birthday fell more than 18 days before or after mine.

I have never romantically pursued anybody whose birthday fell more than 60 days before or after mine.

Weird. Eerie. Also, lots of people have April b-days. Daaamn.
Meggan Cheesebagel
05 March 2012 @ 01:58 am
I wish more people appreciated just how difficult it is to be liked by individuals who don't really "get" you. It's not easy. It is often painstaking. It's having to answer a never ending battery of questions upon every encounter. It's being grilled over every tedious aspect of your life, and every trivial little bit of fluff you utter. It's having to justify every choice you make and every reaction you have. It's having to explain, down to the most miniscule detail, every activity you partake in, every interest you pursue... It's having to rationalize literally every last instance of self-expression you enact. It's being constantly classified and pigeonholed as part of an attempt to distill you down to something easier to grasp. It's having to constantly hear over-simplified assumptions about your activities and experiences, and glaring misinterpretations of your thoughts, feelings, and motivations.

Most of all, it's feeling all alone even when you're surrounded by people because you are constantly made so. painfully. aware. that you are something "other".
Meggan Cheesebagel
30 January 2012 @ 01:09 am
I just nodded off and dreamed that I was rubbing a cute girl's feet. When I snapped awake, I felt a vague sense of disappointment that it had been a dream. lolwut?! I don't have a foot fetish that I know of...I guess my subconscious + semi-hypnagogic state thought it would have been fun to give a foot massage to another woman. Weird. Eerie. ...Hot.

In other news, lately I have been feeling self-conscious and as if my intellect and artistry are the most un-sexy, undesirable things about me; that they make me less attractive and less enticing...I wish I could shake them so I could have actual sex appeal, but I can't, so I'm doomed to come off as frumpy and spinsteresque no matter what. Booooo.
Meggan Cheesebagel
08 December 2011 @ 06:51 pm
oh. my. fucking. god. I have been so fucking sick the past three days and the biggest problem with me being sick is that most people just get lazy? I get lazy, however, something about how I'm wired causes fevers to make me really jerky and AGITATED which settles into this weird, unpleasant and bird-like goofiness by the third-or-so day. I wish I could just sleep it off like most people, but it's so hard to sleep when my internal thermostat feels like somebody took a sledgehammer to it repeatedly. It turns out I need two kinds of antibiotics because I have a strep infection in my throat and a ??? infection in my pee-tubes, ughhhh, how the fuck am I supposed to pay for all these fucking meds when illness has caught me out of work for the past 4 days?! Vicious cycle wheeee. Sick so I can't work so I can't pay for meds to get better so I can work to buy meds. Doesn't help much that it took me days to even get an appointment with anyone because, while I have seen other doctors in PA, a lot's changed with my insurance since I moved here and when I called several offices, I was told that I needed to call my insurance company to put that office on as my primary care provider. So, I did that, but was told that it could take a couple days. WTF? That shit just won't fly when it feels like my throat and pee-tubes are on fire. Love how everyone cares more about their precious red tape than about actual sick people.
Meggan Cheesebagel
07 November 2011 @ 08:48 am
For dinner, I made pumpkin soup and a rice pilaf with chicken, yellow squash, and mushrooms. Jon (my room-mate) loved it, and I was pretty damn happy with it myself.

Here's how I did it, for those of you who have always wanted to try one of my recipes.

Savory Spiced Pumpkin Soup:

1/2 tbsp. unsalted butter
2 cloves fresh garlic, crushed
1/2 small yellow onion, chopped finely
2 cups vegetable broth (for thinner soup, use more - up to 4 cups)
1 can of pumpkin purée
1/2 tsp cumin
1/2 tsp salt
1 half of a cinnamon stick
1 sprig of fresh tarragon
Dash of nutmeg

Turn on stove to medium heat. Melt butter in a medium-sized sauce pan. Stir in the garlic and onions and sauté until golden brown. Turn heat to high, pour in vegetable broth. Bring the broth to a boil, then stir in the pumpkin purée. Reduce heat, and stir the mixture thoroughly until it is smooth. Add spices gradually, to taste. Serves about 2.

Autumn Chicken-Rice Pilaf:

1 box of plain instant rice pilaf (I used Near East brand)
1 tbsp. olive oil
2 1/2 tbsps. vegetable broth
1 clove fresh garlic, crushed
2 whole, medium-sized yellow squash, sliced into rounds
1 whole, medium-sized yellow onion, chopped coarsely
1 cup of white mushrooms, chopped coarsely
2 boneless, skinless chicken breasts, sliced into thick strips
2 tsps. black pepper
2 tsps. cumin
2 tsps. paprika
2 tsps. Trader Joe's "21-Seasoning Salute"
2 pinches of dried rosemary
1 lemon wedge

Prepare instant rice pilaf according to the instructions on the packaging. Set aside.

Twist the lemon wedge over the chicken slices, rubbing the juices in. Allow the lemon juice to set briefly. Then, rub the seasonings/herbs evenly onto the meat according to taste.

Coat a large frying pan with the olive oil with the heat on medium-high. Sauté the garlic and onions until golden brown. Add the seasoned chicken strips and cook until white all the way through and golden brown at the edges. Pour vegetable broth over the chicken slowly. Allow the liquid to come to a boil. Add the squash and the mushrooms, stirring until they are thoroughly cooked and browned at the edges. Once all ingredients are fully cooked, reduce heat to low. Continue simmering at low heat until the stock is completely boiled down into the meat and vegetables. Serve the meat and vegetables over, alongside, or stirred into the rice pilaf. Servings: About 2-4.
Meggan Cheesebagel
18 October 2011 @ 01:27 pm
Steve has gotten quite a few body modifications over the past two months. He now has something like seven or eight tattoos (nice ones, too!), and he just got a septum ring which he pulls off beautifully. This all makes him exponentially sexier in my eyes. Not that he didn't before, but he pretty much has to fight my horny ass off with a broom anymore. He's going to get two lip rings, as well - one on each side, to evoke fangs. It's gonna be hot ;3;

I want to get some tats myself (starting with a piece on the nape of my neck representing the 4 seasons with intertwined images of cherry blossoms, hydrangeas, red maple leaves, and juniper sprigs. I could do without the piercings (for me. they look good on him, and other people).

Kind-of-vague-ness time (but only because I really shouldn't NEED to name names at this point in the game), yay:
You know, I really don't care if I'm "overly sensitive", "picky", or "too serious" - if something makes me uncomfortable, it makes me uncomfortable. When you supposedly "like" and/or "respect" somebody, and they tell you that you are making them uncomfortable, if you are anything even resembling a decent human being, you appreciate their discomfort; not tell them that they need to lighten up and that they should be flattered. It's never good form to ever tell anybody they "should" feel any way at all! Me, I deeply dislike being treated like a novelty or a fascination. I don't like having every little thing I say off the cuff referenced and quoted incessantly, even (or, in some cases, especially) as a joke. I don't like being in a position where I can't lift a finger or say a word without some corny comment being made regarding it; it's like having my very person deflated into some kind of mascot. It's hurtful when someone thinks your life to be so bizarre, that when they mishear you as having said something entirely absurd, they actually entertain the idea that they had heard you correctly. It's burdensome when someone displays much more interest and care towards my life and affairs then I even have in me towards theirs - what am I to do in that situation? I dislike conversations that play out like an interview, and too many people treat me that way, rather than just a regular human being they can have a back-and-forth with....I want to be a peer; to have peers...but so few people seem to view me as one. Why? I don't think I'm that much smarter or more interesting than the next person. It's not like I see myself as unequaled, nor do I see myself as being above anyone, so wtf. it would make me feel so much better to hear from someone else who has gone through similar issues and feels the same way, so maybe I could better articulate to others and to myself exactly why this all bothers me in such a visceral, nerve-twisting way. So much better. But I can't seem to find anyone with similar experiences and/or feelings regarding these experiences, which makes me feel even more alien than I am being treated and ugh, it just goes 'round and 'round and 'round. Also, to make matters worse, I still do feel like sort of a bitch for basically saying "I want attention, but only the understanding, 'Yeah, I get it' kind, not the fascinated, 'Oooooh, woooow, what is THAT?!' kind." But I do. That is what it is, for better or for worse! I can't help it.
Meggan Cheesebagel
16 October 2011 @ 08:54 am
Yesterday, I tried my hand at making steaks for the very first time. THEY TURNED OUT AMAZING OMG. I topped them with a home-made veggie gravy with sage, mixed mushrooms, and steamed carrots. ♥
Meggan Cheesebagel
06 October 2011 @ 03:12 am
Describe your perfect pizza.

First of all - nice, soft crust. If the bread part of the pizza is too burnt or too crispy, the pizza is therefore ruined for me. I like tomato sauce, but a thin layer of it. Same goes for the mozzarella - I don't like when it's laid on so thick that it's chewy - I want it to melt in my mouth. As for toppings: spinach, fresh garlic, some finely chopped broccoli, a few little morsels of ricotta cheese, a bit of ground, spiced turkey sausage, aaaand pine nuts. (I know, that last one sounds like a weird topping, but, yes, it does have its place in the craft of pizza-making, and it is fucking awesome.)
Meggan Cheesebagel
23 July 2011 @ 07:04 pm
Which movie or book character are you most like, and why?

I have no idea. How about yous tell me who I'm most like, and then I'll return the favor?